After being married for 50 years, I took a careful look at my wife one
day and said "Fifty" years ago we had a cheap house, a junk car, slept
on a sofa bed and watched a 10-inch black and white TV, but I got to
sleep every night with a hot 18-year-old girl.

Now .... I have a $500,000.00 home, a $35,000.00 car, a nice big bed and
a large screen TV, but I'm sleeping with a 68-year-old woman. It seems
to me that you're not holding up your side of things."

My wife is a very reasonable woman. She told me to go out and find a hot
18-year-old girl and she would make sure that I would once again be
living in a cheap house, driving a junk car, sleeping on a sofa bed and
watching a 10-inch black and white TV.

Aren't older women great? They really know how to solve an old guy's
problems.

__________________
"We can judge the heart of a man by his treatment of animals." ~Immanual Kant~

That's right! Women are great at finding solutions!!

Glad you're back K2C! Missed ya!!

__________________

Thanks Cookie, back atcha!!

Women's Ass Size Study

There is a new study about women and how they feel about their asses, the results were pretty interesting:

30% of women think their ass is too fat
10% of women think their ass is too skinny
The remaining 60% say they don't care, they love him, he is a good man, and wouldn't trade him for the world...

Good one Cookie! Kinda mean and sweet at the same time!

REDNECK LOVE POEM

Mama knows best!!! Atta Girl Cookie!!

Just received it in email I love it when something is unexpected & actually makes me laugh outloud! I'm still smilin' over it.

A lady in a bar saw a cowboy with the biggest boots she'd ever seen and asked if it's true what they say about men with big feet being well endowed.

Grinning he replied 'Sure is... Come on out to the bunkhouse and let me prove it to ya?'

Curious, she spent the night with him.

Next morning she handed him a $100 bill.

He said, 'Well, thankya, ma'am. Ain't nobody ever paid me fer mah services before.'

She replied... 'Don't be getting all flattered....take the money and buy yourself some boots that fit!'

Atta girl!

Love All the jokes...thanks to all of you for the laughs!

Great, love them all thanks for the laughs

One morning, the husband returns the boat to their lakeside cottage after several hours of fishing and decides to take a nap. Although not familiar with the lake, the wife decides to take the boat out. She motors out a short distance, anchors, puts her feet up, and begins to read her book. The peace and solitude are magnificent.

Along comes a Fish and Game Warden in his boat. He pulls up alongside the woman and says, "Good morning, Ma'am. What are you doing?" "Reading a book," she replies, (thinking..."Isn't that obvious?").
"You're in a Restricted Fishing Area," he informs her.

"I'm sorry, officer, but I'm not fishing. I'm reading."

"Yes, but I see you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment. I'll have to take you in and write you up."

"If you do that, I'll have to charge you with sexual assault ," says the woman. "But I haven't even touched you," says the Game Warden.

"That's true, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment."

"Have a nice day ma'am," and he left.

^


A husband and wife are shopping in their local Wal-Mart. The husband picks up a case of Miller Lite and puts it in their cart.

'What do you think you're doing?' asks the wife.

'They're on sale, only $10 for 24 cans' he replies.

'Put them back, it's a waste of money!' demands the wife.

So he does and they carry on shopping.

A few aisles further on along the woman picks up a $20 jar of face cream and puts it in the basket.

'What do you think you're doing?' asks the husband.

'It's my face cream. It makes me look beautiful' replies the wife.

Her husband retorts, 'So does 24 cans of Miller Lite and it's half the price!'



HUSBAND DOWN, AISLE 7!

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