My parents are both obcessive perfectionist types.. and so am I.. Im doing everything right with my life right now, I started my own company, just hired my first employee, I dont do drugs, I dont drink, I take good care of my self/health - and still my dad mostly keeps p ushing me to do more, to be better, comparng me to other succesful young people.. I think this has been causing me a great deal of stress for a long time and today I finally couldnt take it anymore.
Ive been so happy lately and for the first time in my life feel like im doing everything right.. and today my dad was going on about this young guy who just sold his company for 80 million dollars and 'how come im not doing that?'
It made me feel completely empty and deflated and actually sucks all my motivation away.. I feel like im doing my best and actually succeeding a great deal - and to then be compared to someone else - makes me not care at all.. like .. if im already trying my hardest and thats not good enough then who cares about anything?
I sent my dad a long email explaining how it made me feel and citing similar instances in the past.. How can I shield myself from this negativity and love myself no matter what my parents think? I tried not to let it effect me but I think it really did today.. maybe because its been building up a long time.. Im already a perfectionist myself - the last thing I need is someone telling me im not doing enough all the time.
Any advice? I know its a pretty common experience im having.. the feeling like your never good enough thing.. my parents do love me and they provide a lot for me - they have good intentions but dont realize how much there words effect me. The worst part is, I think my dad is just trying to spur me on to keep doing better, but it has the opposite effect.. it makes me deflated and depressed.. where as if he were to just love me and support whatever I choose to do and congratulate me on success I think I would do a lot better.
Ive been so happy lately and for the first time in my life feel like im doing everything right.. and today my dad was going on about this young guy who just sold his company for 80 million dollars and 'how come im not doing that?'
It made me feel completely empty and deflated and actually sucks all my motivation away.. I feel like im doing my best and actually succeeding a great deal - and to then be compared to someone else - makes me not care at all.. like .. if im already trying my hardest and thats not good enough then who cares about anything?
I sent my dad a long email explaining how it made me feel and citing similar instances in the past.. How can I shield myself from this negativity and love myself no matter what my parents think? I tried not to let it effect me but I think it really did today.. maybe because its been building up a long time.. Im already a perfectionist myself - the last thing I need is someone telling me im not doing enough all the time.
Any advice? I know its a pretty common experience im having.. the feeling like your never good enough thing.. my parents do love me and they provide a lot for me - they have good intentions but dont realize how much there words effect me. The worst part is, I think my dad is just trying to spur me on to keep doing better, but it has the opposite effect.. it makes me deflated and depressed.. where as if he were to just love me and support whatever I choose to do and congratulate me on success I think I would do a lot better.