The year is 2029 . . . .
The year is 2029 . . . .
� Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh largest country in the world, Mexifornia (formerly
known as California).
� White minorities still trying to have English recognized as Mexifornia's third language.
� Spotted Owl plague threatens northwestern United States crops and livestock.
� Constitutional Amendment passed that allows illegal aliens to run for U. S. President.
� Baby conceived naturally . . . scientists stumped.
� Couple petitions court to reinstate heterosexual marriage.
� Last remaining Fundamentalist Muslim dies in the ATM (the American Territory of the Middle East, formerly known as
Iran, Afghanistan, Syria and Lebanon).
� Iraq still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least 10 more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels.
� France pleads for global help after being overtaken by Jamaica.
� Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be imported legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned
all smoking.
� George Z. Bush says he will run for President in 2036.
� Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $17.89 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only.
� 85-year, $75.8 billion study finds: Diet and Exercise is the key to weight loss!!!
� Average weight of Americans drops to 250 lbs.
� Japanese scientists have created a camera with such a fast shutter speed, they now can photograph a woman with
her mouth shut.
� Massachusetts executes last remaining conservative.
� Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals violates their civil rights.
� Average height of NBA players now nine feet, seven inches.
� New federal law requires that all nail clippers, screwdrivers, fly swatters and rolled-up newspapers must be registered
by January 2036.
� Congress authorizes direct deposit of formerly illegal political contributions to campaign accounts.
� Capitol Hill intern indicted for refusing to have sex with congressman.
� IRS sets lowest tax rate at 75 percent.
� Florida Democrats still don't know how to use a voting machine.
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